Sad Departure

Finally letting the tears fall freely now...
Didn't realize I was keeping it all in
In the midst of all the sadness and anger and disappointment
I'm really outraged at the extent of how far people would go to bring someone down, I'm really distraught by everything
I thought the matter would die down after Jaebum's public apology and if he lay low for a few weeks or so
But that isn't the case, I was shocked at the rapidfire of this matter
It's like a raging fire engulfing everything in its way into flames
Everything is happening too quickly, brash decisions made under pressure
I was really shocked beyond words when I read the news that Jaebum is leaving Korea for his home back in the US
All I could think of was, this isn't really happening... it can't be
But I was wrong, this nightmare is really happening right now as I write
Jaebum really left to board the plane just awhile ago
I've seen the airport pictures of him and the crying fans
And it's not making it any easier for me to accept the fact that he's leaving
It's only making me more emotional and heartbroken
I'm so distraught, I don't even know what to say but cry
I wished this was all a nightmare and that everything will be back to normal when I wake up
But it isn't and there is nothing I can do about it
All I can do is just watch him leave
And I just feel so helpless, knowing that I can't do anything to make him stay or feel better
I don't know how is he feeling but it must be pretty close to sadness, distraught, regret, sorry
He must be feeling disappointed and bad about himself
I wish he wasn't, it was a past mistake and he apologized for it
So why won't they forgive him and move on with their lives?
They don't have the right to probe into his privacy and dig up his past
And they shouldn't even push a person so far into despair, pressuring him with threats and silly meaningless petitions
Why are they being so unfair to him, just because he's Korean American?
They shouldn't be allowed to crush the dreams and future of a promising young star, they can't do that... they're not allowed to
He's still young, he's only 22...
He shouldn't have to go through this so early in his life, no one should
No one should be publicly criticized and condemned for something like this
It wasn't his fault to begin with
It should be the other way round, the fucking culprit who exposed Jay's private conversation with his friend should be put to shame
But I guess that's the downside to being a celebrity, there's no such thing as privacy
You're always being watched and scrutinized for the slightest things
One mistake is all it takes as a reason for them to bring you down
Which is pretty ironic if you ask me
Because no one would even give a damn if you made the same mistake, because you're not a celebrity
It's just all so very wrong, twisted and distorted...
What has the world come to if it cannot forgive and let live?

All I can say is that admist all of this, I will still support you and have your back no matter what, Jaebum
Stay strong and endure all of it like a true leader
I hope you're gone for now, but that you'll be back
And when you do, you'll prove them wrong, all of them
With hopes that 'You Might Come Back', I'll be waiting for the day
Love you, saranghae Park Jaebum~ ♥